It's been a while

As you guys remember from all my 2+2 posts I had to give up my devotion to Nessie for a while. Sure it was one long blur of truck stop prossies, a spiral downward of Ritalin and more ritalin and of course that was a gateway drug to Adderall which of course the natural follow up was huffing air freshner, that was a bitch to kick but like any good bitch it kicked back, so that led to a devotion to high stakes bocce ball, shirts and skins kickball and before I knew it I was so hooked on gambling on any athletic endevor like Synchro Swimming I was back in rehab.

Pulling myself out of that funk, was first and foremost an exersize in funtilly. I'd like to exersize in FUN TILLY (Jennifer that is). Oh you guys, it has been too long. TOO LONG. I didn't even know my blog was still up but here she is. This devoted pink whisper of femininty. Some days in rehab I'd look at Dr. Drew, pictures of Dr. Drew actually, and think Adam Corolla is pretty talented. Loveline was a great show. I once had a friend with a mangina and Corolla unibrow... or was it a vag and a Corolla unibrow, I forget. I can't remember. The doctors say that's a side effect from the air freshener. If only I had stuck with fresh scent and not explored the Pressed Cottons and the imported Vanilla Bat Stool. Those are the ones that really messed up my memory. Did I tell you I went to rehab for huffing and gambling? I can't really remember too much of it though. This last year has been one sweaty mess of deer ticks, cankersores, and playing in the bush and even as think back I struggle to hold onto anything tangible. Was I at Lillith Fair or was I trippin on shrooms (those portabello have a kick) in my basement in Reno? Who can tell. My travel agent? Maybe. I know I was surrounded by a mass of people, and a bush is a bush is a bush, whether it's in my backyard or the blueridge mountains, bush is good. Though not for President. Go Kerry! Though, speaking of bush with my friends, what was a fold and what was gold, nobody knows, as I say it's all gold, and it was a blessed time even if I can't quite remember if I was at Burning Man or on a bus in Hoboken.

Know this though. I will be posting and posting more often. I miss my old friends. I'm back, breeders, so look the f out.

Video of the final table of sorts

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Vegas--Craziness

First off where to start? Vegas is electric. I've been killing the tables. I've discovered 2-4 Limit and I've been on fire. I've probably cleared $100 3 or 4 times. I've only lost about $200 twice so I think I'm doing pretty good.

The Rio is just so impressive I get sweats walking in there. Somebody told me I had bingo wings so I've been flapping them a bit to keep the players I'm railbirding cool. I've run into a lot of fans who know me from my blog and I think it's great. A couple of kids were even sucking their thumbs in reference to the title of my blog. Some of the railbirds have confused me for the Read Deal Nessy but that's okay, I like the attention. I almost signed an autograph or two but the japanese guy was actually just showing me a map.

First of all, the Clubs here bring a smile to my face. I think someone once said, "A stripper under a spotlight is the apple of adam's eye." I hear that. Put me in the Garden of Eden and it'd be apple sauce for everyone. I'm enjoying Sapphire club when I go out tonight with Mona, Mischa, Montella, and Tiny Tina. I hope to have some pics up soon.

The Main Event is whittling down and Toby Maguire busted out. I was sad. I loved him in Brokeback Mountain. When he exited I railbirded him and told him I loved him. I think he said "Blog you!" He knows me. I might make a T-shirt that says "Blog U." Like it's a university or something. You could also do a "FU" one all college like too. I got that at the idea dump. That's a polite way of me saying it came to me when I was taking a dump. The name the idea dump actually came from the idea dump. Isn't that ironic, don't you think (Mariah Carey).

I will give you guys an update soon. The newsweek thing hasn't worked out but I'm talking to a couple of websites about cross-pollination right now. I think Cardplayer may make me a quasi-celebrity blogger so i'm pysched.

The real Vanessa Selbst

In response to one of my fan's questions I am not the real Vanessa Selbst, but I am real and Vanessa Selbst. Unless you know me from the 2+2 fourms (is that you SuckHeed?) and by real Vanessa Selbst you meant me , the famous blogger and the up and coming player/fan. On that note I want to say thanks for the emails of support folks, you guys have been the light in my tunnel. Without the fans I'd be not famous. Your light in the tunnel is not like the headlights of a train running me over either it's the bright lights of a truck.

I have trucker-ed in my time. Our motto has always been "I'm not here for a long time but I am here for the good time." That should be a motto people use to apply to life's lessons. I've certainly had my fair share of truckstop prossies, and while a good night can often be measured by the thickness of the mac truck imprint on the folds between my shoulders, the best things in life can't be found on the side of the road, even if you eat roadkill, life is best experienced in the journey of life because life is a freeway and I'm going to be ridden all night long (Dave Matthews).

First things First, Some of you were alert enough to let me know the Newsweek thing might be a scam. And the Nigerian prince might not be a prince either but I'm checking with my lawyers, but the good news is I'm in the midst of a bidding war beween the two www.GulfCoastPoker.net s to write for them at the world series. If they have their logo in flannels or golf hats or floaties for my bingo wings I might even wear it at the World Series.

Just kidding Kev and Gene. Really another website is going to link to my blog and get my WSOP coverage, Verticalsmilepoker.com. I don't know if they are trademarked yet, so Kev maybe another opportunity for you there. Anyway, I'll get the hotel but they said they'll get me a buffet for every event I play in and later write about. So, C.S. I guess I'll see you in Vegas. I'll post a note on your blog, maybe we can meet and eat out.

Friends from 2+2 Email ME!!!

I'm on the verge of a nervy breakdown. Newsweek has asked me about my blog and suggested I could cover the WSOP Main Event for them. All I have to do is pay for my airfare but once there they will put me up for just a $100 a night cost to me at the airport Red Roof Inn and they might use my article. I'm supposed to meet up with a Lieutenant Franklin and give him my money and he will take care of all the small details. That's a good offer right? Oh, oh, before I forget, friends I also got an email about a Nigerian who's fallen on hard times and needs some money just to be able to excess his considerable fortune. I may start a collection on this site or on myspace. I never heard of such tragedy.

Please in these tough times, it's friends that prop you up and our friends are our future, so as I struggle with my newfound fame I'd really like it if you guys could offer me some support on my blog and let me know what direction I should go in. You guys know who you are AnnieDukester, SuckHeed, and elmaitred. I am at my witless end on this.

Interview Requests

The tears of a clown are tears no one can see because they rain down under the make up of the painted man. I think Stevie Wonder said that. It has to do with the glare of the spotlight being so bright it burns, I think. I feel that effect first hand. I once read an op-ed piece that compared midget bowling to putting a albino under a heat lamp with a stencil on his chest. Now I am that albino.

I feel the wax wings of hercules melting under my sweaty folds as I got too close to the sun, and now I have to write here for everyone to see I am turning down all interview requests. If you want to talk about the content of my blog, my admiration for Vanessa Selbst that's one thing but if you want to discuss sex issues I will not participate. For the first and last time, I am happy in my own sex. I do not think the content of my blog should be focused on that issue.

Moreover, I would prefer it that the people who call me the next Brandi or girl that called terrance chan "johnny" just back off a bit. Like that silent fart under the sheets in the company of your loved one, let's let this air out a bit.

First things first, please don't make me pull this blog. Though it's only been up for a short time I feel a deep love and effection to it. When I conceive a child be it through borrowed sperm or in a completed reception I hope to emote the same way to that diaper wearer as I do this endevor--that's how much this means to me.

Thankyou.

sorry forgot my links and quotes

"You'd think my favorite hand would be Aces but I get them cracked a lot. I prefer kings because with the cowboys you can get off the horse. Nothing beats horseback riding but when you are sore sometimes nothing beats getting off."

http://morethoughtsfromtheshower.blogspot.com/ Here's a great blog from our friends at USC.

"The next great american sports game will be high stakes bocce. I've played it and I know."

Here's a "link" no pun intended to one of my favorite video game blogs...

http://bloggingzelda.blogspot.com/